It is my intention to get you caught up with us and where we are in the process of foster-to-adopt. I must warn you that this may be a long post or it may be a multiple day post where I add to it for a few days until the story is complete. In any event it would behoove you to subscribe to this blog, follow me on Twitter, or check my wife's Facebook page for updates.
I am twelve years old, my wife 33, she has almost three times the amount of time as a follower of Christ as I have, so to no surprise she is more sensitive to the calling of the Holy Spirit than I am. It seems that the Spirit moves her in a particular direction while I sit in the sandbox playing with trucks wandering where she is headed. I became acutely aware of our spiritual differences a few years ago when she brought up the issue of homeschooling our three children. I will explain and it does relate to adoption, eventually.
A few years ago our "unofficially adopted" son Daniel was at our house with his family visiting, it was the first time we had met his family and because they are fellow believers the connection was immediate. During the course of conversation Daniel's mom (Mrs. S) asked my wife a simple question about her satisfaction with the public school system, as our son was in public school. Mrs. S had no idea that the seeds of homeschooling were planted in my wife's heart years prior, soon after our second son, who is now 9, was born. When they left we talked about what we talked about while our guests were there and that is when homeschooling came up. Not that it had not come up before, but in the past it was just something we briefly talked about, it sounded nice, but at the time I was thinking:
"Oh, great she's one of them, now what? Should I start buying bonnets, fanny packs, black Velcro shoes and patiently wait for TLC to contact us for a possible reality show? Homeschooling!!!!! Are you serious? Can you say FREAKS? Oh and now you say it is from the Lord, now what?"
I was resistant to the whole idea of sheltering our kids at home until they are 18 and then throwing them to the wolves of the world to be devoured. I was in fear that someday our kids would end up on "Homeschoolers Gone Wild: Why Public Schoolers Can't Party Like These Kids"
Don't miss that: FEAR, you will periodically read about my fears, we all have them, even those of us that know God is sovereign. I know that a spirit of fear is not biblical, so don't get all preachy on me and start quoting scripture and admonishing me; just pray that when I have a spirit of fear that I would trust God. By the way I do not live in a spirit of fear, only with certain issues do I get fearful and normally I pray through it with the Spirit and He conquers it for me, so back to the story.
The truth is I knew nothing about homeschooling and only knew 2 home schooled kids, Daniel and Doug from down the road. I have a B.S. in Education and a Master's in Education and not once in all of my post-secondary education did any professor talk about homeschooling, I bet that has changed since then. Suffice it to say I was ignorant about the whole process and the motivation. My wife brought it up, I resisted and brought up the argument of SOCIALIZATION, hey now I have TWO degrees in education I know what I am talking about, kids need public school to learn how to socialize, WRONG. I am now going to resist launching off on a rant about the ignorance of the general public about homeschooling and leave you with this fact: a majority of our presidents were homeschooled. After much prayer, research, prayer, discussion, prayer and discussion I fully embraced homeschooling, years after my wife had felt the call, and that is how we got to adoption, same pattern.
She (wifey) is convicted in her spirit about adoption and is ready for it, I am not, after prayer, discussion and so on I leave the truck in the sandbox and move on towards adoption. Now before the complementarians start crying foul and accusing me of not leading in my family, you have to go back a few sentences and see that my wife did not move forward with homeschooling until I took the lead and the same is true with adoption. She was ready for the race before me, she was at the starting line with her shoes tied, but she would not start running the race hoping I would catch up. NO, she waited for me to step up to the line and run before she would go. My wife knew that to go on without me would be sinful and lead to a strained marriage. Women, let your man lead, pray that he would lead if he is not and pray that you do not usurp his role as leader in the family.
I need to point out that that my wife has two wonderful children from a previous marriage and without going through any official process, I adopted them, raised them, loved them, cried with them and prayed with them. I just felt like they were mine and I NEVER NEVER NEVER call them "step" children. They are mine and I love them and thank God for them, and they were used by God to save me, but that is a another story: Soli Deo Gloria. I have already raised someone else's kids, so what was my problem? Well, I see that this post has gotten a bit lengthy, I have that tendency, but please check back for the rest of the story . . .